Real Estate, Yoga and Other Bullshit

Here I am, restarting my blog.  It’s Thursday and I’m sipping my coffee, sweating from the excessive heat (internal) not sure what to do with the rest of my life, watching a crane deliver a marble slab to the 9th floor of my building.

I’m here because I’m tired of real estate.  I don’t think sales is the role for me.  If someone says they don’t want to buy or rent, I’m just like “ok” and move on.  I think that comes from my inherent distaste of being sold, which I think is a potential future post on its own.  Don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed it.  But mostly I enjoy helping other realtors than I do buyers, sellers, renters and landlords.  I can speak with a real estate agent and they’ll know what I’m talking about.  Speaking to someone outside real estate about real estate frustrates me.  Maybe that’s the internal heat coming through.  Working with other realtors is not inconsistent and often doesn’t pay well considering the effort and time often applied.  There are times that I’ve broken down compensation for hours put in and in several cases it’s below minimum wage.  No shade to the other realtors, that’s just how the game is played.  Results are what pay.

The back story is, I used to work in food.  This blog started as a food blog.  I was working as a private chef for Matthew Kenney in LA.  He was moving and I was always at his house.  The agent his landlord hired had cancer and was always texting me “can you do the showing” and since I was there I said sure.

A little more back story is that I love a good residence.  I live in one myself.  I moved to Boston to go to Boston Architectural College.  Lasted a year.  When I first moved to LA I lived in North Hollywood and my friend LB and I would walk around the Hollywood Hills on the weekend going to open houses, just admiring.  I’ve always had an interest in design.

So back to working for Matthew cooking and showing his house.  He eventually ran out of money so that job was over.  I missed the east coast, so I moved back and got my real estate license.  As much as I love cooking, my style is very specific and not widely appreciated.  I didn’t want to change my way for other’s preferences.  This is a recurring theme, be it good or bad.

I started at a new small brokerage on Newbury Street.  I was the seventh agent.  It was fun, I got to do my own thing and it was a fun group.  As the office got bigger, it became more “professional” with offering services and charging agents and I wasn’t into it.  I left for a small property manager in Brookline who kept rentals in house.  I also did rent collection and bookkeeping for them.  It was fun, but I had felt like I hit a ceiling.  I was done doing shitty student rentals and calling parents to tell them their kids didn’t pay rent and therefore, they were on the hook.

I met my current friend and dare I say mentor, who referred me to where I am now.  That was like 2018.  It allows me to be pretty independent.  At times I do feel stifled by the brand.  One time early on I posted a photo of myself wearing short shorts and a tank top on IG and apparently higher ups reached out to my mentor to tell him it was inappropriate.  Prior, I had never been to concerned about my public appearance.  In case you didn’t know, the Real Estate Uniform is as follows:  A tight fitting button down, tight fitting pants that are too short, a logo belt buckle, preferably Ferragamo but Gucci will do, and lastly loafers (no socks) also with a logo.  The shoe logo can’t match the belt logo.  As you build your success, the logos can get smaller.  They never go away though.

Long story short, I’m sure that if I were outspoken on any sensitive issue, it would be an issue.  An agent from another office was openly pro Trump and while it wasn’t a major offense, it was definitely frowned upon.

And I’m not that “good” at real estate, as I previously mentioned.  I’m not salesy.  I can accurately predict how events will unfold and what should be done to get desired results, but I fall short of convincing people of such.  Their problem, not mine, right?

Anyway, I’m looking for something different.  Something more creative or advisory.  You know what they say, those who can’t do teach.  So I’m launching myself as a real estate coach.  Just kidding.

I like yoga.  Kind of anyway.  I like being in and experiencing my body but I don’t like the yoga cult and current ideology that I find retarded and dogmatic at times.  I’ve toyed with the idea of teaching.  My preference for a class is a beyond a standard deviation from the current model and think I would have a hard time being hired and a harder time filling the class.  It would be a quiet class, very inward focused.  I wouldn’t hesitate to tell someone to shut the fuck up because I can hear them breathing.  It would also not be strictly yoga poses but have my own elements in it.  I would have no problem teaching an hour long class just standing still.

My problem with most yoga classes is that they’re a workout or at best an intentional distraction.  Heat, music.  I’ve literally heard teachers say they want to hear the students breathing and I personally cringe at that.  I don’t know what’s “right” or “wrong” but for me, it’s breath focused and silent.  Classes are geared towards wage slaves looking to off-set sitting at a desk for 9 hours a day.  It’s a workout class.  But then you get there and the teacher is all spiritual (I’m making a generalization) about “checking in with yourself” (for like 15 seconds, if that) and “setting an intention” or some bull shit.  Then the top 20 playlist starts and it’s fucking push ups until the “Ohm” and “Namaste” at the end.  The attendees got the physical activity they so desired and burned off the adrenaline from the day.  They got a brief sense of calmness, followed by a distraction from the rest of the day and an increased heart rate, followed by a brief sense of calmness.  The irony is that to me, that’s not true yoga.  Neither is what I would teach, but it would be much easier for the mainstream practitioner to call me out on it than their own class.  I don’t claim to know what true yoga is, but I don’t believe its that.  I can’t imagine some proto-indo-european flipping an hour glass and doing a set routine until the last grain drops and calling it quits for the day.  Teachers can talk about the 8 limbs until their blue in the face but at the end of the day the purpose of a system is what is does.  All of that being said, I go to a yoga studio and enjoy the classes and teachers.  It’s not a perfect set up for me, but I can also practice at home and do my own thing.  It’s fun to go be distracted sometimes and get into poses I forgot about or have been avoiding.  It’s social too.

So I’m sitting here tired of real estate, thinking about what to do.  I don’t want to cook because there’s not a demand for my style of cooking and want to continue to enjoy it on my own terms.  I enjoy yoga or whatever, but don’t want to fall into that same trap.  Oh also, I applied for a job to be a manager at the yoga studio I go to.  32 hours a week for $45k/year.  I was like oh that’s a shoe in, nobody else is going to apply for those hours with that compensation in this city.  Well, they never got back to me.  Didn’t even confirm receipt of my application and resume.  So I’ve been thinking about opening my own studio, lol.

I’m hesitant to use the word problem, but I’m not sure what else would be appropriate but also imply less significance.  The only problem would be, is that I think there is limited demand for my preferred my style.  Much the same way of my cooking.  Maybe this is a me perceptive issue.  But anyway.  I’ve mentioned the idea to a few people and it seems lost on those with whom I’ve spoken about it.  My mom, who has never stepped into a yoga studio and spends the majority of her time in a chair in front of the TV, doesn’t think I’ll be able to generate a client base.  My very entrepreneurial friend with whom I have shared the most, including business plan, investment thesis, customer thesis, has recommended I just buy a pre-existing yoga studio.  My rebuttal to that, is that my idea of a yoga studio is counter to the existing model.

If I were to open a studio, it would be based around an open studio concept.  There are set hours where someone can walk in and use the studio as they see fit.  There would be a teacher there to offer any kind of guidance or adjustments.  If someone wanted to come in and use the space for their own routine for 2 hours, that’s fine.  If another wanted to come in for 10 minutes and ask questions about a pose or a sequence, that’s cool too.  If a student wanted a specific adjustment, they could get it.  I’m not sharing my entire 22 page business plan here, but that is the gist and basis of the concept.

Both my mom and my friend’s opinions have their merits.  The after work yoga goer is probably not going to be interested in that.  It’s a little more niche.  At the same time, starting up a studio from scratch is probably more time consuming than buying a studio.  However, buying a traditional studio and changing the whole model would probably piss off many of its current members.  I could also see the instructors not appreciating the new model.  We’ll see what happens.

If you made it this far, I don’t really care.  This is more about venting and catharsis for me and getting my thoughts on paper.  By posting it, I get a sense of productivity and can give myself a gold star for the day.  This is an unedited stream of consciousness piece.  I’m thinking I might continue with these because I have many thoughts on many things and enjoyed writing this.

I don’t give a fuck if you like, subscribe or share. I might even prefer it if you don’t.  If you comment, there’s a high likelihood I won’t respond.

Sent from my iPhone